8 - Picking an effective Coach - Deepa Malik’s inspiring journey of overcoming extreme adversity to winning medals at Paralympics

Deepa talks about the discipline that she got from an upbringing in the Armed Forces context. She specifically discusses the point around planning for tomorrow and having Plan B and Plan C for situations. She also discusses the mindset of being prepared for the unseen which has helped her overcome extreme obstacles.

Deepa recounts her twin-ordeal in 1999. Her husband was fighting in the Kargil war and she was anxious about his well-being. At the same time she had a tumour in her back that worsened which got her to a point where she had to make the choice between leading a normal life and facing a high probability of death or going for surgery to improve her odds of living but in a wheelchair. She discusses how she navigated this passage of play.

Deepa talks about the mindset with which she took stock of life when she had chest-below paralysis and had to recalibrate her approach to her activities, schedule, relationships and aspirations. She talks about how she developed a sense of gratitude for what she had and how she and her family chose happiness. She also talks about how her hobbies enabled her to immerse herself into an activity and bring happiness to her life.

Deepa shares her thoughts on the trade-off between seen as a “different person” versus being seen as just another individual who can do most of the things that a regular person can. She talks about how it is about her taking the onus and putting the other person at ease rather than expecting the other person to react to her situation. She says “if I am OK with it, they are OK with it”.

Deepa talks about how she took charge of life and how she became a restaurateur and in seven years, had built a flourishing business giving her financial independence. She then talks about her passion for biking and how she wanted to create records on a bike to ensure that her voice is heard and for her to be able to have an impact on Society.

Deepa talks about her pursuit of excellence led her from one place to another and eventually to a medal in the Olympics. She talks about the 68 National Golds and 21 International Medals including medals from Asian Games, Paralympics, World Championships and Commonwealth Games.

Deepa talks about her disciplined approach that enabled her to win the Silver Medal at the Rio Paralympics. She also talks about her frame of mind and personal context which gave her the fire to make the Silver Medal winning throw on that day.

Deepa discusses her approach to picking a Coach while training for Rio Olympics. She mentions that given the uniqueness of her body condition and the training need, the traditional coaching approaches did not work. She talks about how she worked with a biomechanics gym trainer, watched her diet and worked on her psychology as preparation for the Olympics.

Deepa talks about what gives her the resilience to deal with difficult situations and how people can build that muscle. She talks about the criticality of moving from a “wallowing in the problem” mindset to a solutioning approach where you think about how you want to drive change and be the change.

Deepa talks about Wheeling Happiness Foundation, an initiative she and her daughter have started. She talks about how they plan to bring hope to the life of people and become a medium towards creating an inclusive and accessible (physically, emotionally, mentally) India.

Deepa shares her perspective on people playing to their respective potential. She discusses the criticality of having a happy mind, staying positive and having the discipline and work towards it. She urges us to be true to ourselves for us to push towards excellence.